McK is soooo unreliable!

But that would be because I've been working so hard and editing so much, really, really, really.

So with 35,000 edited and another 5000 written I'm safe. And youse?

McK lives! And March reporting.

Ahem. If you think I'm running behind here, you should see my 'to do' pile at the office... I figure you all know which badge to take, I haven't seen any rampant cheating (apart from Whirl, of course, but that's normal), so I'm trusting you... up to a point.

How was March? I remain on approved, having edited 30,000 words and written about 5000. *preens fur smugly*

Still no gadgetry...February reporting

It may surprise you to learn that the Koala is not the utter slacker you might think (who said that?) - I've checked back regularly and I'm still missing my gadget editing links, despite much logging in and out. Perhaps I need to dig more deeply into the back end of the  blog, maybe they have moved the access whatsits.

Anyway there's not much point in putting up January now, let's just say you all did very well, even those who didn't, leave it at that, and move on to February. Well, I go straight back to approved after editing 65,000 words. Thank you, thank you.

And youse? How did you go in February? I promise to somehow get this place fixed up and get the points up!

Can't edit side bars at the moment

The little gadget that gives me access has disappeared and I can't see an alternative way to get to them. If I'm missing something obvious, let me know, otherwise I'll wait for Mr Gadget button to reappear then update the Koala stats.

Yes, I'm logged in...

Free stories!

Koala challenge reporting post below!

If you're all written out, then it must be time for a reading break. How about some freebies?

This Tuesday, January 31, you can download the Extinct Anthology from Amazon's Kindle store, for free! Here's the blurb for this most excellent anthology: "Echoes of yesterday touch the lives of ordinary people in extraordinary ways in 18 provocative stories by some of the best up-and-coming authors of mainstream and speculative fiction around the world."

Or pick an individual story from Extinct - free, on Tuesday and Wednesday. You'd like to read mine? Why, thank you for asking. You'll find Blood Fruit right here. It's a bloodthirsty little sci-fi number about Levo, one of the last survivors of a pampered world that loses the technology it depends on.

You can check out some more of the writers and their stories at their blogs - if you go to Phoenix's you will see a montage of all the covers - they look fantastic all together. 

Phoenix Sullivan: Extinct Doesn't Mean Forever
 Chrystalla Thoma: "The Angel Genome"
Peter Dudley: "Distractions"
Kenneth Burstall: "Connect"
Scott Thomas Smith: "In Ring"

Are we ready? Reporting in for January!

The Koala is smugly preening her fur after a fab January. 15,000 words and three, count 'em, three short story submissions. One of which got tossed out immediately, because it would have been a reprint and the publication had changed its policy on that. Whoops. But I tried. And I start the year on nine pristine points at the top of the eucalypt.

Read the full story of Koala pointage here, and report in below! (And the 2011 awards post is below this one if anybody missed it.)

The 2011 Koala Awards

Ah, I do love this. I look back over the year and check out all the scores and the excuses... Here we go for 2011...there are some new awards this year, just for fun...

Most Sympathetic Bystander aka Loudest Gloating for Having the Sense to Not Actually Get Involved: Fairyhedgehog

Person who Talked the Most about Reporting In, but Never Did: Travis

Award for the Best Manners: not sure if I'm awarding this one this year. I think everybody sassed me at some point. Although Angie, Sempra, Stevie, PD, Stacy and Jenna were pretty nice to me mostly. Tell you what, split this one six ways. The rest of you Must Try Harder.

The 'I Know It's Nothing to be Proud of but I got There First' Smackdown Award: Writtenwyrdd

Most Humiliating Smackdown: Me. Again. I'm an embarrassment to myself.

Award for Best Excuse for Not Accruing Pointage: Iasa "I spent two weeks in a cave" (that's the best I got this year. No, it's not up there with "I got married" or "I got flooded" – come on you lot, Must Try Harder)

Worst Excuse: Whirl for: "A chimpanzee ate my homework"

Worst Poetry Award: (yes, last year this was a Best Poetry Award) Whirl for

How he cruised
in the slipstream
of a koala's laxness
Now his corpse lies strewn
upon the floor,
bollocksless.

Award for the Most Points in a Single Month: Angie (30 - she admits it was the goad of Nano that got her there, but who cares. Impressive!)

Most Graphic Description of a Koala Attack: Merry (I won't put you through it again, but she mentioned intestines and surgery)

High Five Award (for most achieving a high score after months' of dedication to low scoring): this year it's the High Fifteen Award and it goes to…. Iasa

In and Out Award for Most Inconsistent Reporting: well, this is humiliating, one year she won the top award, the next she came third overall, but this year… due to international moves and other such shabby excuses the winner of this one is… Robin!

And now for the big one…McKoala's Most Consistent Writer and Submitter for 2011

This was really hard fought this year, with many people consistently producing high numbers, well above the nine points needed for Approved.

Third: Jenna

Equal second: Angie and Stevie

And the winner is…

PD Singer!!!! (Once she let us call her Pam, but that was before she got all famous and everything)

Congrats to PeeDeePam - and to everybody else who survived the year!

An amazing number of people fell by the wayside this year. Let's take a moment to remember Those Who Couldn't Hack It for a Whole Year (some of them confessed…most just hid behind the sofa)

Lauren K

Daniela

Sarah

Phoenix

Merry

Writtenwyrdd

Julia B

Erastes

Bid Merry, Aniket and Phoenix a fond farewell, because they have confessed to needing at least a year off to lick their wounds. I'm mentioning them, because they had the courage to tell me, so I only scratched them gently. As for the others who attempted to slide off behind my back...well, let's just say, we may not see them for some time…